i don't think anyone doesn't think about opportunity costs and things that we forfeit when we make certain decisions, because that's what the world shaped us to be: pragmatic, practical and defensive. i weigh almost everything in my life, which includes time spent at church. sometimes my heart runs so dry, that it doesn't make sense to go the extra mile to seek God.
when i first came to Hope, God touched me, made me so weak and filled me with emotions that expressed themselves in tears. but God doesn't always manifest in our weakness, He makes His presence felt in times of joy as well. today i received holy spirit baptism and the gift of tongues, which made me overjoyed and fulfilled. I thought of the various channels joy reaches us and the forms it disguises itself as...Joy from God doesn't keep our adrenaline pumping and spirits high, but it does convert itself into peace and reassurance every other day. While knowing God doesn't make our lives smooth sailing, it changes our attitudes towards obstacles. It's like how in education, we'll never be equipped with enough knowledge to adapt to the society, but we should always have the keen attitude to keep learning and trying.
God found me and renewed me with His grace today, and filled me with joy that i chased afer so dearly after the first encounter, which i thought was something i wouldn't give up for anything. It's comforting how God's love is so available, so within reach...you are entitled to it so long as you pray for it. It doesn't disappoint, doesn't fail. We work so hard for material, and put in effort but the returns are so transient, it just isn't worth the effort. today i opened my heart and He opened the floodgates and we praised him and lifted our voices to Him today, clapped our hands and prayed till it tired us out.
today i gained so much, i didn't know where to begin at first. my hands are weak and my voice sore from praising the Lord, but i felt..answered.on the ride back home i jotted down feelings and thoughts that i can look back on for future reference.this lady sitting beside me was crying and trying to hold back tears, which must have been horrible so i prayed for her secretly but earnestly cos i thought she might be better off with some healing.
anyway cool stuff aside, cooler stuff is that WE GOT SENT TO JAIL TWICE during game session like for absolutely no reason cos the game masters didn't know what to do with us. jail is really silly we did like stupid things. -.-
anyway (again ._.), God gives us gifts, i think I got quite a few but I guess the one that spills out of me is the spirit of joy? I mean I kid about it most of the time but HEY HEY HEY NOT EVERY ONE GETS IT OKAY!
