we got all our results back, and when it comes to grades i get really anal (AND I KNOW IT) but at the end of the day it's not about outshining, doing better than half the class/cohort/whatever, but it's the issue of accountability, whether you can answer to yourself, whether you let those who expect from you down. It's not a matter of doing best, but it's a matter of doing..better. better than where your hopes put you, better than what you did before, and it gets suffocating that it becomes hard to accept when you aren't reaping what you sow. but i guess sometimes the criterion for things isn't as simplistic as silly addition of numbers, it's about how hard you try, the effort you put in, the opportunity cost, the little intangibles that people can't see, but you know it yourself. God sees it too. And at least for now you have the reassurance that you have a God who rewards you according to His riches in heaven and has plans to prosper you, not to harm you. It's difficult to be oblivious to how well others are doing, but it's perhaps even more mentally taxing on yourself, if it bothers you so much.
so.. it's the cliche stuff on taking losses in your stride and all.. and i know it's hard to pick yourself up and move on, but pick yourself up, anyway.
okay above sums up what i need to tell myself and probably people who read this.
